I'm quite a patient Mum to my boys. I wasn't always that way, however with each addition it really became a necessity! I had no escape, I was with them 24/7 basically. Due to breastfeeding them each for 12 months I also didn't get a lot of time away while they were very little.
My best ideas for saving sanity are...
1. Let the house go....as much or as little as you can handle.
a period of time after Ethan and Jayden were born I hired a cleaner.
It was such a help! Did I have time to clean my house? Yes, I did. Did
I feel like cleaning my house? NO!! On those random days when all boys
napped or were engrossed in a movie I wanted to chill out. Not start
cleaning!!! Seriously, if you walked into my house right now you'd all
probably have a heart attack but it will get clean, one day, probably
when my boys are grown up and out of the house. Seriously though, pick
the things that matter most to you, your partner/husband and kids and
prioritise that. So in our house, Michael hates not having clean
laundry so I prioritise that, then comes the kitchen. The kids honestly
couldn't care less about any level of cleanliness (in fact Louis once
told me he likes it when the toys are everywhere because he just never
knows what he might find when he trips over them!) however I hate them
losing parts of sets of games etc so picking up toys are next on my
list. I have also been known to clean even just 1 room and vacuum it.
Sometimes the idea of cleaning an entire house from top to bottom is
enough to motivate me to take the kids out to the zoo for the day
instead. Don't fight it on
those days when it's all too much...there's always tomorrow.
2. Take time out.
looks different for everyone! My time out (as you may have already
realised) can simply be zoning out in from of the computer! My mum
always used to hassle me to go out and take a class or socialize but in
those early years honestly, I just wanted to veg without a little
person needing me. Now that the boys are older (6, 5, 3 and 2) I don't
feel the need to get that time out so much unless I'm sick or
particularly overwhelmed. I enjoy their company and their antics and
feel like I've mellowed a lot more. Now if I decide to take a class or
socialize outside of the home it's because it's something I really want
to do and not because I'm trying to escape them! Sometimes more than
anything we just need to rest and rejuvenate! If I was particularly
stressed out I would find a book or website, blog or facebook page that
would inspire me. Often it was enough to restore my gratitude for my
family and my children and for the role I have as Mum and bring me back
to a place of appreciation for all that I have. Find out what really
works for you and make it happen.
3. Relax and enjoy.
my gosh. When I had Louis I thought it was all about routines and
getting him to nap at this time and for this long. Honestly, no wonder I
did my head in! I expected him to hit certain milestones such as
sleeping through and I honestly just didn't understand how individual
each child could really be! I'd been told not to cuddle or rock him to
sleep, to stop breastfeeding him because he looked hungry and all sorts of other
ridiculous advice. If someone gave me the same advice today it wouldn't
worry me, but back then I was so unsure of myself and I really just
wanted to do the best thing for him and all it led me to was more
uncertainty!! I PROMISE you (unless you choose too), you won't be
giving your child nighttime breastfeeds when they're 5, you won't be
co-sleeping with your child when they're 8 and you won't be rocking your
child to sleep when they're 6. If you don't make them to a do a
chore list as long as your arm they will still learn to be productive
human beings. They will not turn into axe murderers from playing video
games. What are the biggest clashes you have with your child/children
right now? I'm sure they're are ways around those arguments rather than
someone winning or losing everytime. Find a way for everyone to win
and enjoy themselves! Are some of your rules because of fears that you
have for the future? Are they realistic?
4. Have an easy family meal on hand
something aside from takeaway that is easy to make and that you always
have the ingredients for. In our house for many years (and 3 out of 4
still eat it) it was "Cheesy Pasta". Nutritious? Not really. Easy?
YES! It meant that I could make it in 10min, it didn't cost anything
and didn't involve the age old husband/wife debate of who was going to
call and who was going to pick up the takeaway! Michael never was a fan
of pasta but on those nights when you honestly can't be bothered
cooking I'm sure your husband can look after himself (he would often
have 2 minute noodles or something equivalent) No, this is not
something you want to be eating every night but really, it's no worse
than fish and chips!! Again, find what fits you're family...
Pasta (any type although I would usually use spirals)
any type of pasta as per usual. Drain and add back to saucepan. Add a
good squirt or tomato sauce and a good tablespoon of tomato paste. Mix
in lots of grated cheese until melted. Serve.
(I did attempt to add veggies one day but they knew and didn't eat it...oh well...I tried!)
are idea's that don't rely on money, partners or childcare and can be
utilized by most families in most situations. Can you relate to these
idea's or have any that you'd like to add?