I was always told, due to a number of my big ideas that I would no doubt be a success some day. I used to come up with all sorts of big business ideas, and I would get caught up in the idea of making money and proving to everyone how clever I was.
This even continued after I started having my boys although as time went on my ideas grew smaller...
Of course, out of all of these great ideas nothing ever really took off. Yes, I started a small dance school which was a lot of fun but I kept it casual and fun and there was never a whole lot of pressure.
Then, as I started working on my own personal growth I dreamt of ways to help other people...I could become a life coach or start weekend retreats. I could study yoga or counselling. The list went on and on and changed sometimes weekly.
I soon realised that the idea of all of this was great, however I really didn't want to do any of it when it came to the practical side.
So, naturally after this realisation I started to think that I just must be lazy and unmotivated. Who in this day and age doesn't want to strive for bigger and better? Who doesn't want to earn more money to buy bigger houses and new cars, luxury holidays and expensive clothes?
Turns out that I don't.
I started to think about all this ego building success and wondering how satisfying it would be if the relationship with my children suffered? If I missed so many important firsts and if they grew up thinking that I valued career, success and money more than I valued them?
Just to point out, these are the decisions that I came to, that resonated with me and I feel is in line with my calling and purpose in my life.
I have never been so content and at peace as I have since I letting go of all the inner conflict that I once felt.
All of a sudden, I didn't feel like I should be more. That what I'm doing wasn't good enough, and that I needed to prove that I was worth more to anyone. The amazing part is that I started getting so much more done!! Because it's where I was meant to be all along. I'm achieving more with my family and in my home and I'm becoming the mother I always wanted not just in theory but in practise.
I can't predict my future, however I have trust that everything will continue to fall into place now that I'm not fighting it.
If there's one message I would really love to send out to anyone reading, please have trust in yourself. That you are just right the way you are. If you find yourself battling internally, or you're in a constant state of stress to get through your day to day, take a step back. Reassess who you are and what you love. What are your passions and what is your purpose? Get back to basics and work out what you value most in your life.
Of course, we all have responsibilities and not everyone drop everything to follow their passions at any given moment, but just asking yourself those questions can be a start. We can always start altering our path little by little with each choice we make.